Cold Turkey

I have allergies. The one that I currently find most obnoxious and problematic is my allergy to pineapple. You see it isn't a common food allergy. No one is going to get slapped with a multi-million dollar lawsuit if they fail to acknowledge pineapple is in something. Dairy, nuts, whey..... all of these gems that cause terrible side effects are well documented on labels. Pineapple, not always. Often? Yes. Always? No. And so I was struck by the evil fruit (which ironically used to be my favorite fruit, stupid late onset allergies!) about a week ago. I had some coconut rum that had it in there, because by nightfall of drinking it, my entire top lip inside and out was erupted in cold sores and canker sores. DELIGHTFUL! I did my very very best to avoid my son with my mouth or my hands if they had been near my mouth. No sharing food, nada. We had managed to avoid any previous potential catastrophe earlier this year when I was exposed by an jelly belly! Who knew jelly bellys contained REAL pineapple?! Siiiigh.

Today we awoke to see a little red dot on our son's lip. Oh no. Now he had fallen the evening before and busted open his lip very near where this dot was. However, the blood yesterday was on the inside near the top of his bottom lip and this dot was on the outside at the bottom of his bottom lip. Could it be a bruise? It seemed to be circular - a blister didn't seem to be there exactly, but (while we could hold him still) it did appear to have a white dot.... Oh no! So we took him to the walk in clinic. The doctor was of little help. Not so much to his own failures of medical knowledge but because the red dot didn't really have much of a blister - he said it could be a cold sore, it could be a clogged pore due to the heat, it could be from where he cracked his lip the night before. Siigh. He took a swab but was not confident that since there was no real blister to speak of that it would yield a positive result. He said if a blister did form over the weekend to bring Ace back in and he'd simply swab it again - no appointment or waiting required.

Also while we were there Ace got to stand on the big boy scale for the first time ever. He did very well ... until he tried to step off while mommy was answering the nurse's question and stumbled into the wall as he toppled over. However, we did find out that he weighs 19.2lbs now. Then while Loving Husband and I were waiting with Ace in the room, Ace busted the other half of his bottom lip open trying to retrieve Nemo who had fallen to the floor. The step to get up onto the table caused said resistance to his lip. Poor kid, take him to the doctor to get better and ends up with a bonk on the head and a fat lip.

The doctor decided that since there is a chance, albeit a slim chance, to spread cold sores to a nipple that breastfeeding was out of the question until we got a) the negative results back or b) the cold sore goes away. Excuse me?! No breastfeeding? Do you understand this is my son we are talking about? The no bottle, barely solid food boy? Are you MAD?! In addition to that my last few experiences with pumping have been a struggle. GREAT! Now to Ace's credit he has been in the last few weeks taking a bottle every now and again and in the last two weeks has been enjoying some goat's milk out of them. So I'm glad he's finally gotten on the bottle train or today would have been a real nightmare.

Yes, my son had to go cold turkey from the boob. After leaving the doctor's office, we went to BRU to purchase some formula. Worried that my pumping problem would persist (say that 3xs fast!) we thought it best to have it on hand. As it turns out - Ace HATES formula, he drank maybe an ounce and would not touch it after that. However, goat's milk was a decent alternative most of the day. He drank about 7oz. of goat's milk and solid food on his regular schedule. The only real challenge was nap time. I put him in the Ergo carrier and the poor boy tried to root around on my chest, there was about an hour of fussing and sadness, but eventually taking the bottle and conking out on me for his standard 45 minute nap. Not the most comfortable for mommy, but it was ok - it was a special time for him and I.

The whole potential pumping problem? Not so much of a problem after 10 hours. Yah since Ace's last nursing session was 7am - come 5pm I HAD to pump. Since I am hoping that this is only a temporary cold turkey situation and that I can continue to nurse after the sore is gone, I am not wanting my milk to dry up. I want Ace to naturally wean - this is not natural for him or me. This might very well be how we transition from nurse all day to early morning/night only though in the long run - but for now I'd like to still produce the same amount that I currently am. Considering that's only really occurring in one side. Yes in less than 20 minutes I pumped 12oz... out of one. An impressive feat. Ace enjoyed 6oz over the course of the rest of the evening and the other bottle ready for the nighttime wakings. I pumped again at 10 and gathered an extra 6oz in case he's super hungry in the night. Then we'll revert back to goats milk for a while in the morning.

Overall, Ace is doing ok with the cold turkey. He's been sad a few times and his dad had to get him to sleep tonight without me because it broke my heart. Tonight will be the first time when my little boy wakes up sleeping next to me that I will not simply roll over and let him nurse. It breaks my heart and it hasn't even happened. Perhaps tonight will be the night he sleeps through the night and I don't have to deal with watching his semi-sleeping-self root around desperate to find his midnight snack and instead being meet with a bottle. Perhaps in a few hours the 'cold sore' will disappear and merely be a bruise from the first fat lip he receive and I can pull my baby into my side and let him nurse till our hearts are content.

I hate you pineapple. I really do.