No Seriously. Im not kidding.
Let me begin. Shannon and I wake up at good ol 4:45am so that I can get ready and catch my 6:30am flight. The morning is all good and glorious, I am off to Boston for a week and I have no work! I love it what could be wrong with this. I check my luggage at curb side, YES! No weighing of the bag. I get some McDs breakfast, eat that and then stroll onto the plane in plenty of time, but not a lot of lag time. A perfect trip to the airport and boarding of the plane.
I take my seat in 8F, the window, my claustrophobic safe haven. Excellent. 8E comes and sits down, a fairly normal guy, but he had a cold YUCK. I hate flying on a plane with people with illness, so this is going to be the worst of it, yah? Nope. God was laughing at me, and saying, just you wait. Next comes Row 9D-F onto the plane. Careless Guardian in 9D, two mini-soccer players in 9E and 9F, ages 3 and 5. Soccer players, you ask? Yes, because they spent the entire boarding of and flight of the plane running two by two between Careless Guardian and the window much to the chagrin and beyond rage-insightful me and 8E.
So, you think thats the worse of my hell? Sick neighbor and soccer playing terrors? Nope. Were still boarding, remember? So, they are about to close the doors and 8D is remaining empty, we think that maybe we might just get lucky and have that seat open and thus extra room! Nope in walks the Smell of Death. This man had never showered, I am pretty sure. Yet, he wore a business suit and looked mostly just like a hangover had taken hold of him but man the smell was putrid. I instantly get weak in the stomach. What am I supposed to do now?! Not only is it recycled air through the whole plane, so at least I can take comfort that I wont be the only one in olfactory senses hell, but hes 2 seats away from me and the only one in a worse position (8E) cant smell anything anyway?! So, I quickly jump to action and pull out some lotion that I have in my back. (Arbonne Awaken Lotion, THANK GOD for Aromatherapy!) I quickly rub that on my hands and immediately rub my hands all over my nose hey, desperate times call for desperate measures.
The plane takes off and I render myself unconscious somehow when I awaken, for the most part, my smelling abilities have mostly been killed and the flight is decent. Note, we are flying to Washington, D.C. this is NOT a short flight and mini-Mia Hamm and mini-David Beckham, behind me, are still at it. So, I watch some tv in front of me (I love to fly JetBlue if for nothing more than my own personal tv in the back of the seat in front of me.)
We begin our decent into Dulles Airport its a bit turbulent, but nothing that bothers me- I kinda like it. J However, 8E decided he couldnt handle it. :: If you are eating right now, Id stop:: I am looking out the window when it happens. I hear 8E cough and then I smell something (the in-flight snack of cheese and crackers) and I look, to look to him, but my head stops when I look at my tv screen which is now covered in his vomit! What does he do? NOTHING, NOTHING AT ALL! He just sits there with his arms crossed as if it was ME or if it wasnt even there. Between Smells Like Death in 8D, Mini-Hamm & Beckham behind me, and NOW Vomit Man in 8E with VOMIT on my tv screen - I would have jumped out of the plane if this was option.
So the plane lands and I RAN off the plane and screamed. Out loud. I didnt care I really did feel at that point I too was going to vomit. Sick Sick Sick! So, yah that was my flight to the East Coast. My flight TO Boston was far less eventful, and THANK GOD!
Lesson learned? Dont scoff at people that have colds on a plane. God will enlighten you, that you know what? That THAT is the least of your problems.
1 comment:
Sounds like a good case of "Flights are like a box of chocolates....You never know what your going to get."
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